Sunday, May 11, 2014

For Mother's Day

Our ward has a tradition of giving mothers mothers' day off. The men take over all the classes and all the women get to go to Relief Society. Ben taught sharing time, and he told me Reid gave the best answer of the whole day. I was (obviously) excited, but then Ben proceeded to share the story with me. "I asked, 'does anyone know who Nephi was?' And Reid shouts 'he was a bad guy.'" Oh Reid. Oh sharing time.

This afternoon we went for a family walk, and poor Ben ended up carrying both our children. Near the end of our hike it started to rain and the kids were in high heaven, running in daddy's arms. Their giggles were absolute beauty to my ears. I tried to capture it on video, but keep in mind we were running ... so it's a wobbly one.

This evening my Sister-in-Law posted the below gem on facebook, and since it is mothers' day I wanted to share it. Patricia Dischler (author and birthmother - 1985) wrote:

There are 10 things every birthmother thinks about, wishes for, and hopes for when placing their child for adoption. If you are in an open adoption, you may have heard some already, if not, they are important to know. They are:
  • I did not place my child because she was “unwanted.” I wanted her so much that I continued a pregnancy filled with unanswered questions.
  • I chose adoption because I loved my child. This parental love allowed me to put his needs before my own when making my choice.
  • This choice affected more than just me. She has a Grandmother, a Grandfather, and Aunts and Uncles who love her as well, and she will be missed.
  • I wish for the day I can look into my child’s eyes and tell him I love him one more time.
  • I hope that you will teach my child about her beginnings – about where she was born and who I am.
  • I hope you will teach respect to my child by showing respect for me in your discussions.
  • I wish I could be there to answer my child’s questions about adoption, but I trust you to answer them truthfully as best you can.
  • I will never stop thinking about my child. She will always be a part of who I am.
  • I would never try to disrupt my child’s new family with you. I put too much emotion and suffering into making this choice to allow anything to disrupt it – including me.
  • In my eyes, you will always be my child’s Mom and Dad. And that thought brings me happiness.
I have heard people refer to adoption as the selfish way out, and this just astounds me. I can think of no greater love than to continue a pregnancy filled with unanswered questions. Putting our children's needs before our own desires is the greatest love we can offer them. Ethical adoption is the ultimate sacrifice. 

Happy Mothers' Day to all mothers -- with or without children living in their home. 

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