A Week Without Dad

We were fatherless around here last week. Well, I wasn't. But the kids were. Ben was at a work training in Reno. He left Sunday at 4:30am and we were reunited Saturday at 5:00pm. That's right, just 12 hours shy of a full week.

We couldn't go to Church on Sunday because we were still contagious with hand-foot-mouth. We did spend several hours outside, which was nice. I noticed I felt a little more motivated and a little more ambitious around the house. By evening time I even had some pride riding around on my shoulders. I was pooped, but I didn't loose my patience or throw in the towel. I just sat on the couch and invited all three kids (and their duplo weapons) to join me for some reading time.

All FOUR kids hanging out on my lap/legs

This pride hung on for a couple of days, and I noticed I was actually a better parent and housekeeper without Ben around. This is definitely an "it's not you, it's me" situation. When I know Ben is going to be around to do part of the parenting and cleaning I get a little lazy. Maybe even a lot lazy. Knowing I was the only person fully capable of cleaning the kitchen meant I cleaned it twice every single day. Knowing I was the only person fully capable of meeting all of my kids needs helped me stay more mindful during our interactions.

Of course, this honeymoon stage wore off pretty quickly and I was grateful for the little breaks I got when I went to my 28 week check up (neighbor came to babysit) and the YMCA for a couple of workouts. I also looked forward to the evenings, when the kids would be in bed and I could decompress after a long day. Although, I did let them sleep with me the first two and final nights. Coraline slept withe me one night in the middle. So I really only had a bed (and therefore the evening) to myself half of the time. 

The thing the kids missed the most about Ben was definitely wrestle fighting and acting a little bit wild. I sensed it as the days drug on. I was having them burn off energy, but not in the same way they burn it off with Dad. I'm a firm believer that kids do best with both a male and female presence in their lives. It was apparent this last week as Ben was away. 

Weekend Nature Walk

We decided to check out a Nature Preserve in the community North of us. Oshkosh has several little Nature Centers and some nice nature walks along the river and lakes, but we don't have one big designated wildlife spot. I've written about Heckrodt Wetlands numerous times, it's in the town about 10 miles North of us. But we've never been to Gordon Bubolz, which is about 18 miles North of us. 

Ben actually said he preferred it and couldn't believe we'd never been here. I'd heard about it years ago, but just always felt satisfied with the places we'd already explored. Anyway, it has a good balance of forest, prairie and wetland. We took a forest/prairie hike, checked out the visitor building, and then fed turtles at the main pond. Here's some photos of the outing.

When we stopped for a snack break Reid built this cool little creation. He spent the rest of our hike imagining what animal might come discover/play with it. He was pretty proud. You can't really tell in the picture, but the stick is actually at an angle above the ground, being held up by other sticks. He would have kept building it up forever had we let him. 

Nell of course needed to be carried for a bit every now and again. Daddy sure loves lugging around his girls. At the end of the trail we heard some sort of wildlife in the pushes just off the path, so Ben went to figure out what it was. Suddenly he got all excited and reached down to catch it. I wish I had recorded the kids reaction when he pulled a garter snake eating a frog out of the bushes. They screamed so loud and took off running for a good 50 ft. They were going full speed and had no intentions of ever stopping. A couple other hikers were approaching in the opposite direction and they didn't know if they should laugh or run for cover. When I finally caught up to both kids at a bench near the trail entrance they were both covered in tears. I finally calmed Reid down enough to go back and check it out. He's been so into snakes lately, I was really surprised it scared him so much. I told Ben he'll have to narrate his actions next time, a little "okay, I'm going to pull out a snake eating a frog" might have gone a long way. 

(pictures from Ben's phone)

(turltes)

The turtle pond was appropriately named, as I've never seen so many turtles in one place in all my life. The kids were in heaven watching them all fight off small catfish for the fish food we threw in. The lady running the nature center building gave us a free bag, which was very nice of her. Ben's already planning to go back and we'll be sure to take some cash donations next time. 

We love supporting local wild areas!

Our Anniversary and the Fourth of July

Now that I've finally finished blogging about June -- mid-July -- I decided I'd better go back and look through old July photos and see what I should write about before my end-of-the-month July post turns into a monster. But have no fear, there are actually very few photos. This month has flown by!

Ben and I celebrated our 10 year anniversary on July 1st. We didn't go on a date. We didn't exchange presents. In fact, I spent most my day recovering from dealing with a puke baby the day before. I did try to make a big deal out of it with our kids. I told them today was our family birthday. So of course, they wanted cake and ice cream but I was too busy sanitizing our house and checking either of them for signs of illness. Once we'd been vomit free for two days we started celebrating (I think her sickies might have just been a side affect of her 18 month immunizations -- or she may have drank too much kiddie pool water when we played outside, who really knows).  

We put five candles on our cake (one for each of us) and even sang "Happy Birthday Dear Family." The kids loved it. I'm going to have to try and make this a tradition for us. After that we watched Zootopia via redbox. It was a pretty fun family evening, and like most our birthday parties, it didn't really matter that it was a day late.

On our Nation's Birthday we headed to the beach on the lake just north of us. Oshkosh (or Town of Algoma, rather) has no public beach on Lake Butte de Morts and it kind of drives me crazy. We are less than half a mile from this gorgeous body of water and there is no public access! Grrrr. Instead we have to either go across the city to the icky Lake Winnebago beach or head North to another town and enjoy Lake Winneconne (yes, we have three large bodies of water within a ten mile raidus of our house -- welcome to the Midwest). 

So anyway, we drove up to Winneconne and enjoyed a picnic in the park (and on the beach) with all our Church friends (who were able to come). The kids were in heaven and played in the water and on the beach for more than two hours. 

It definitely wore them out.

After a little nap at home, Ben woke Reid up and took him to the fireworks in another small town on the edge of our ward's Southern boundary (Winneconne is the most Northern part of our ward). Public Service Announcement: small towns celebrate the 4th of July best. That's why, even though we live in a city with some 70,000 people, we drive about 60 miles round trip to various small town festivities to celebrate our 4th of July.

Reid and Ben both had a lot of fun at the Ripon fireworks. Reid was telling Nell and I all about them the next day. He thought the 4th of July was a pretty special holiday, and I'd have to agree with him. God Bless the USA!

Father's Day

Like Mother's Day, I'm here to write my Father's Day post three weeks after the fact. And like Mother's Day, Ben didn't get to spend the day with his kids (though I did get mine for about two hours). We were in Utah and the best we could do was video chat.

The kids were determined to give the candy bars they'd gotten in primary to Ben. But I convinced them to give one to Grandpa and eat the other themselves. They did, however; hold on to these cute handouts. They were very excited to share them with Daddy when we made it back to the Midwest.

Nell's on right, Reid's on left.

There was a lot of cross over on the two surveys. For example, both kids noted Ben's love of naps and their own love of "wrestle fighting" daddy. The sweetest similarity was the "He ALWAYS says" line; Reid wrote "He loves us" and Nell wrote "I love you!"

Reid thinks Ben is good at hunting ducks and his pocket is full of his phone. Nell thinks he is good at opening packages (ha!) and his pocket is full of gum.

We sure were missing Daddy while we were in Utah (though my mom thinks Reid actually missed Mr Toad more). I tried to have him record us when we reunited, but he was a bit blinded when we came to him from his right. The woman standing near by did smile and tell us it was the sweetest welcome home he could have. They were running full speed ahead and happy as could be to get great big bear hugs.

He is such a good daddy!

March Memories

Guess I'll get it over with. I'll blog about March. We found out I'm pregnant and things quickly went down hill. Excitement and anticipation are at an all time high. We can't wait to add this final bean to our family. But to say I've been sick is completely inadequate. I have never experienced anything like this. I am miserable. I cannot brush my teeth without becoming ill. My deodorant has too strong a smell, but of course not wearing it wouldn't exactly fix that problem. Everything smells. Everything. And I can't handle any smells, even good ones.

Ugh, I could go on and on. My poor kids have watched sooooooooooo much TV. I haven't been able to watch my extra little kiddos. I had to call in some Church friends for help and my mom is coming this next week. I am so grateful for the Church friends. Two made us yummy dinners. Another came to my house twice and did laundry, cleaned the kitchen, cared for my kids, and was just absolutely amazing. My visiting teacher, who has three kids of her own, took the kids to her apartment for several hours. I'm sure they were all crazy and tiresome, but I had the nicest break and my kids didn't have to just sit around and watch TV.

There was one afternoon where I could not walk anywhere without having to vomit. This is not an exaggeration. I had a bruise on my forehead from sitting up against the toilet so much. I lost more than ten pounds in just too weeks. I was so hungry and could eat nothing. Man, I was miserable. March was rough, but now let's get to the good stuff.

The kids have loved having swim lessons, and lucky enough -- the two weeks when classes were not held (due to local school spring break schedules) I was the most ill. I would have never been able to take them either of those two weeks. I could hardly leave my bed, let alone the house ... with three kids in tow! Okay, I can tell this whole post is going to have my pregnancy woes weaved into it. Sorry. I just don't know how to write about the events of this month without bemoaning my constant and unbearable morning sickness. 

Reid had the wonderful opportunity of going on a field trip with all his preK pals. I wrote a bit about that back here. The above photo was taken by a friend while they were at the museum. This was their science class. And of course, the below photo is of Nell and I joining him for the Daniel Tiger show. 

That weekend our neighbor came over and gave Nell a much needed haircut. She was so excited she picked her own hair pretties for Church the next day. It's a good cut. Nell does better with short hair. 

Reid made a Lego creation for a contest in the Lego Junior Club magazine. We really need to submit it. He made one last month too, and well ... it's not exactly his fault he didn't win. 

The beginning of March brought on some warmer weather and we were feeling the spring bug! Coraline was a little skeptical about the swing, but she eventually warmed up to the idea. 

The kids were even able to eat their after school snacks outside nearly every day this week. It really made me anxious and hopeful for the nice weather.

During the second week of March Nell had her preschool screening. It's pretty laid back but also very efficient. They fill a big gym with a bunch of toys and activities and follow the child around while they play. Obviously, all three of my kids loved this. Reid even surprised us by knowing some of the PreK administrators (they've been in his classroom throughout the year).

Seriously, Nell cannot hold still for even a split second. So hard to get pictures of her! She did not pass the hearing test, but we went in for a second test just a couple days ago and she was fine. They think she just had fluid in her ears which affected her hearing that first time. 

Coraline has become so particular this month. She won't eat unless she has a utensil in one of her hands. She brings clothes and accessories to me and demands I put them on her. Ben referred to her as a bossy britches in a text one afternoon and I just chuckled at the thought of it. She really knows how to get her way!

This photo is from the middle of month, when my misery set in. Ben has been a real Saint. He's done most of the child rearing and house work these past few weeks. I know it is tiring, but I hope it also feels rewarding. 

When I couldn't decide if I was getting really sick or just having really particular cravings, we drove up to Appleton for a Five Guys burger. We stopped in at the mall so Ben could browse Scheel's and the kids could play at this in door park. Reid shocked us all when we pulled into the massive parking lot and he immediately asked about this play place -- that he hasn't been to in at least 18 months. We never go to the mall. He's really played here two other times in his entire life, and the most recent one was honestly at least a year and a half ago. Ben and I really couldn't hide our amazement as he described this place perfectly before even seeing it. He just smiled at us and said "I have a good remember-er." You sure do buddy, you sure do.  

Monday evening some friends from Church egged our house. I don't know where they came up with the idea, but the kids loved it. They had a lot of fun searching for eggs in the yard and then checking for the prizes inside. They also understood the message really well when Ben opened the empty egg. We don't know for 100% sure who did it, but Nell did say "there goes Maya's dad" when we heard the knock on our door. I'm impressed they'd been running around our yard for who knows how long without us noticing them.

This is when I started to get really sick. Reid's spring break. Which started a day early because of the SNOW. That's right, we had a snow day the day before Spring Break. Oh Wisconsin. I was so glad they were easy to take care of those first few days. They play together so well.  

Coraline was pretty sad she couldn't go outside with them, but she watched every minute of their fort building from the window. 

Both days.

This is also when they started to watch a lot of TV. I loved that they snuggled up together for cartoons. 

Ben took them on a nice nature walk both Saturday and Sunday. That top photo is one of my absolute all time favorites now. When he sent me the bottom he wrote #BFF. It's so true. They are best buds.

These last few photos are all I have from our full week of Spring Break. Reid had been looking forward to play dates with friends and I'd been anxious to use up our museum passes. But we did none of that. We barely survived. Coraline sat with me on the bathroom floor and screamed for comfort. Reid stayed in his jammies all day and snuck Easter ham out of the fridge when he and Nell got hungry. The bottom photo was taken by my friend the day she came to clean and play. Overall I do think they had a lot of fun. Ben pulled off a great Easter. They colored eggs and found them after the Easter Bunny hid them (and their baskets) around the house. They went to church and came home to a nice ham dinner.  All of this while I laid in bed all weekend long.  

We usually don't tell people about our pregnancies until we hit week 13 (or later, I've been known to just never really tell people). But we couldn't really avoid it this time around. Before I became really ill I even thought "I kind of want to mention it on my blog so I can finally record what the first half of a pregnancy is really like." Ha! I've never had a pregnancy like this before. Previously I have felt ill and even vomited once or twice, but this is unreal. I feel like it might be God's way of saying it's okay if we don't have another kid. How could I ever do this to my family again? Anyway, here's to feeling better in April!

The Sickies: Of Disappointments and Gratitude

Wednesday night I was awakened to the sound of Coraline cough/choking. I sent Ben in to check on her, and -- well, let's just say she was sick.

I slept in her room, holding her upright in the rocking chair. I awoke every hour or so, to clean and comfort her. It was a long night, but by morning she was on the mend and I was laying in bed catching up on some missed sleep.

Then I heard Ben holler for help. He'd cut his thumb pretty badly on our apple slicer. I ran out to help him put pressure on his thumb and insisted he sit down. He was pale and dizzy and about to pass out. Needless to say, he ended up staying home from work for most of the day. After several hours in bed, he and Coraline both felt better.

By evening it seemed as though our house would return to normal. But before Ben and I made it to bed, Nell woke up sick. So she and I slept on the couch together. I sat upright in the recliner and she leaned against me, waking up every hour or so for some comfort and clean up.

We had big plans to go see Ben's family this weekend. He has Monday off, and two of his little sisters -- who have a child both Reid and Nell's exact age (like literally born just hours apart) -- are visiting from Utah. We were all looking forward to such a fun weekend with family. That obviously all changed when the norovirus hit our house. We we're definitely all disappointed by that, but I'm actually surprised by how well each of my kids handled the bad news. I suppose they just wanted to slow down and get some rest anyway.

I kept telling Ben that I had a feeling my body would fight it off while I was busy caring for the kids -- but that once things settled and I got to relax I'd be hit. And that is exactly what happened.

Reid woke up Saturday telling me he felt a little sick. Not sure if he was hungry or truly sick, I gave him something light to eat and waited to see what happened. Well, about an hour later he was telling me I'd given him the wrong foods and that they had made his tummy sick. He spent the whole day watching movies. Thankfully he needed a lot less comfort and clean up than the girls. Both because he had a milder version of the stomach bug, but also because he can hold a garbage can and aim all on his own. It's such a lovely stage to enter.

Anyway, my predictions were accurate. Once they were all in bed on Saturday night, recovering quite nicely from all that had ailed us the past three days, my body gave in. Before anything major happened I asked Ben to give me a priesthood blessing. I took note of a couple different promises. One was that I would be healed depending on my faith and the faith of those offering the blessing (Ben and our Bishop). That left me with a lot of hope and I crawled in bed thinking I could sleep everything off.

Well, within fifteen minutes I was rushing to the bathroom. It's interesting to me, how getting the stomach bug always humbles me. As I sat on the bathroom floor I was thinking about that promise, how my faith should have made me all better. I didn't actually doubt my faith (or that of the others), instead I just realized that being sick for those short few minutes was my body getting better. It was horrible, awful for five minutes, and then it was done. My girls had spent 12 hours, heaving every hour -- but I got it all done in five minutes.

I also thought about how having that same illness helped me think about my kids and their suffering, and that of course made me ponder the power of Christ's atonement.

I know, I know ... this post is super weird. First, who wants to read about our bout with the throw ups? No one. No one! And why am I making it all about spiritual things? Well, because getting sick always brings me closer to my Father in Heaven. I still remember a time, some twenty-plus years ago when I was sick and I asked my father for a blessing. He told me it wouldn't magically make me better, and I realized I didn't care. I just wanted words of comfort, sent from my Father in Heaven.

Basically every time I've been sick since then I have asked for a blessing, and rarely have I immediately felt better. At least not physically, but I'm always given the strength to get through whatever ails me. And this phenomenon is worth noting. I love that even in moments of great disappointments -- missing family fun and having to care for sick kids -- I can find gratitude for the wonder that is my body and the beauty that is the restored gospel of Jesus Christ. 

Thankful Thanksgiving

This Thanksgiving Reid is thankful for Nell, painting turkeys, Coraline, school, kisses and hugs, Jesus, and prophets. 

Nell is thankful for grandmas and grandpas, Reid, presents, daddy, mommy, our house, and God. 

I am thankful for Ricola cough drops, sensible bedtimes, Ben's job, story time snuggles, the Atonement, the USA, and farmers. 

Ben is thankful for the Gospel, marriage, family, health, education, Priesthood, and the Internet.   

Coraline is probably thankful for my boobs, clothes (but not socks -- girl hates socks), paper, her fingers, her lovey, applesauce pouches, and screaming. 

Happy Thanksgiving from our family to yours! 

Family Home Evening

We keep postponing Fall Color drives. Each weekend we're like "Eww, let's go to Kettle Morraine like last year" or "We have time to do Devil's Lake after Church." But ... we never did a darn thing. So today, we decided to take a Family Home Evening trip up to High Cliff State Park. 

But first, check out this cute monkey and her charming vet. I love how they play.

We made it to the park just at sunset, which was gorgeous. I hiked up with the two big kids and was having a blast. No worries at all. They were even getting ahead of me and reached the top before I did. No worries. Even when I found Nell poking her little head out of the railings, I told myself the likelihood of her falling was miniscule. No worries!

But I was not enjoying the scenery. I just couldn't. What is it about motherhood that makes little moments like this so stressful? I know other mom's feel it too. One of Ben's colleagues told him just looking at our photo made her nervous, "That baby is just going to fall right out of there!" Oh motherhood!  

Anyway, Ben was kind enough to take the kids down to the car ahead of me, which gave me a moment, just as the sun disappeared into the night, to enjoy the view all on my own. Without any worries. And it was lovely. 

Canyonlands National Park: What to do with kids

Canyonlands National Park is ginormous. It's so huge it has three separate districts, each nearly 80 miles away from the other. We visited the Island in the Sky District, which is most popular due to its close proximity to Arches National Park and Moab, Utah. The Needles District is the Southern portion of the park and the Maze District is only accessible via off road vehicle. That is how primitive this park is, you can spend days and days in the park and only see a small sliver of its grandness. We spent about 6 hours in Island of the Sky and were able to complete two nice hikes, check out a couple of jaw dropping overlooks, and spend lots of time refueling at the Visitor Center. During our time at the park I couldn't help but notice we were the only people with children. No lie. We did not see another child the entire time. Even the park ranger made a comment about that. Hikers were cheering us on ("Go Family!") and giving our kids candy (as a reward for hiking 2 miles). Since kids must be such a rarity in Canyonlands, here's a fool proof way to make sure your little ones enjoy their trip.

Explore the wonderful Educational Tools at the Visitor Center and become a Junior Ranger! I'm probably sounding like a broken record by now, but of all the National Parks we visited Canyonlands had the most crucial Visitor Center. I think it is the only place in the entire park that has running water. We stopped three times during our visit. On the third and final visitor center stop Ben sat down with the big(ish) kids and spent a good twenty minutes exploring the hands on Educational tools they offer. They have dried pressed desert plants, animal track games, artistic info on how the soil grows, and -- of course -- a park movie detailing the geology and history of the area. I really think of all the park visitor centers, this one offered the best Educational resources.

Also (I'll repeat), purchasing an item or two from the visitor center is a great way to support the park. We found an Audobon book to help us identify life in the Southwest desert. Reid loved it!

And there is a lot of fragile life in this beautiful desert
*both photos taken while on GVP hike*

 Shafer Canyon Overlook and "The Neck" offer great views of deep canyon vistas. The scenic drive through Island of the Sky is basically a drive atop a small portion of the Colorado Plateau. You can see as much of the area as your eye allows. You are at the highest points of these intense canyons and there are few words that accurately describe the wonder of it all. The Neck of the plateau is a narrow passing, just big enough to fit the road. Here you can see both sides of the canyon surrounding the plateau. It is nearly impossible to get adequate pictures of the view, so you'll just have to enjoy this one of Ben and I, proving we were there. Though there isn't much to explore around The Neck, it is worth stopping. You can always take in more of Shafer Canyon outside your car than in.

Grand View Point marks the end of the scenic drive, but not the tip of the plateau. Though the view at GVP is magnificent, if you really want to reach the end of the Island plateau you'll have to take the two mile (round trip) GVP hike. We did it as a family, Ben carrying Nell; I Coraline; and Reid walking the entire thing himself. 

Well, except for these 100 steps, where Ben carried him.

Neither my words nor my photos will do the GVP hike any justice. Ben and I both considered this one of the best hikes of our entire National Park (and State Park) tours. Solitary. Dramatic. Vast. Breathtaking. The experience will remind you there is a God. He is Grand. You are nothing. And yet, you are unique and known to Him. And if you aren't spiritual, don't worry, the experience will still shake your soul.

We had a chat on hike safety before we went; don't wander away from mom or dad!

Just taking a bathroom break off the edge of the world.

I can't imagine what it must have been like to work for the Conservation Corps and build trails like this. Hiking these parks always reignites my patriotism. I'm grateful for this wonderful country and our desire to preserve these beautiful places and share them with anyone willing and able to explore their grandeur. 

The end of the hike requires some mild rock climbing. Ben and I took turns going up to the peak. I didn't quite make it to the tip top. My nerves just wouldn't let me (even though a kind French tourist was willing to hold my hand as I finished the last five steps of the climb). After Ben and I each took our turns, Reid decided he didn't want to make it all that way and not see the very top. So Ben took him back up. He was such a trooper to do this hike with us! And his pride was all the reward a parent could ask for. 

I wish there was a way to play the panoramic shots we took. It really is such an amazing thing to have a 360 view at that final tip of the plateau. The below photo was taken near the half way mark, and the mesa jetting out from the left is the starting point. You can kind of make out the trees, but what you can't see is the whole thing is crawling with tourists.

Mesa Arch is a must do hike. If there is any chance you are going to be in the park during sunrise, make it to Mesa arch for that spectacular moment. We were there closer to sunset, but it was still gorgeous.

This hike is a short loop that will only take 20 to 30 minutes of your time. There is no reason Nell (our 2 year old) couldn't have done it herself ... but she didn't. 

Though Reid doesn't look too happy in that photo, he did enjoy the hike. He didn't want to stop playing with this log and stick he found. I love when nature is my child's playground. 

He also had a lot of fun finding Crypto bacteria. It was something we learned about at the Visitor Center. The black tips on the soil is actual fragile desert life. Watch your step! 

Headed out of the park, there are a couple stops on the spur road. We tried to catch a gorgeous sunset at the Green River Overlook (the best spot for sunsets). But the sky turned into a dud and none of the clouds had any color change. It was kind of ironic, since all our park visits had been cloudless. We tried to catch the set in Capitol Reef and there weren't any clouds, and then when we tried again in Canyonlands there were too many. Still, baby and I had an intimate moment with the Creator of all this beauty. 

Seriously, what a sweet little trooper to let us drag her all over these vast spaces. While she and I enjoyed the last few moments of sunlight, Ben prepped the other two for bedtime. And they all slept quiet soundly for the entire 4 hour drive across Central, Utah.

We did not make it to Whale Rock or Upheaval Dome, but one of those three hikes is worth trying if you have the time. The Rock is slick but does have a railing to hold onto. The Dome has two hikes, one short and one longer, but both give you a fascinating look into a crater that was likely created by a meteor that struck Earth millions of years ago. The geology of that corner of the park (both found at the end of the spur road) is intriguing and sure to engage the young minds in your family.

I am so grateful we were able to make these park visits. While Coraline and I were enjoying our moment of peace at the Green River overlook a sweet woman reminded me that one day I'll get my body back. It was an interesting comment, one I know many women take offense to. But in that moment I knew exactly what she meant. She had once had three small children she stayed at home with and cared for each day. She knew what it was like to feel worn and stretched. She knew what it means to sacrifice your body for the needs of small, demanding children. She and I both watched each other in awe, admiration, and appreciation. Our bodies, and the tiny ones we are given to care for, are truly amazing.