Sunday, June 26, 2011

It'll be 5 in 5!

In five more days Ben and I will be celebrating 5 years.  You may get a post about "our love story" each day until then.  Brace yourself.  I'm one who usually shies away from other people's "mushy" posts, but 5 years just feels like it deserves some mush.

While going through old posts (remember when blogging was all about tags and weird internet links?) I found a tag-like activity I copied and pasted from a dear friends blog;  but needless to say, copying the questions to this tag was as far as I got.   So tonight I'm going to start answering some of those questions.

1.  How it all began:  first date, first kiss, first picture, etc
2.  When you knew he was the one:  how and when?

From the get go Ben was different from all the other boys who had ever taken me out on a date.  For starts, we weren't friends first.  I wish I still had the voicemail, but I'm pretty sure it sounded something like this "Hi Liz, this is Ben Szilagyi from the 16th Ward, we met at _____'s house this last weekend, I was the guy with the shoes that have a world map on the bottom of them.  Anyway, I have tickets to a film festival this weekend and wondered if you wanted to come with me?  You can call me at ---.----."  He really didn't need to clarify who he was.  I had noticed him weeks before the "world on his shoes" conversation.  Simply "Hi Liz, this is Ben" would have sufficed.  But I thought it was so cute he felt the need to make sure I remembered him, and how silly of him to think his shoes (and not his beautiful eyes, quirky smile,  perfect body type, and amazing ability to conduct an intelligent but interesting conversation) were how he made his mark. I made him nervous, and that was charming.

Another thing that made Ben different from any previous relationship was simple timing.  The other day a friend's facebook status read "Don't fall in love when you're lonely.  Fall in love when you're ready."  When Ben first asked me out, I was ready.  We both were.

Our first date was a huge success, one where you find out you have everything in common with each other.  And not in a fake way, but sincerely realizing you could talk and laugh the whole night through without any awkward moments.

Over the next couple of weeks I tried to decode his "game."  In hindsight I realize he didn't have one.  He was simply courting me.  Good old fashion courting.  To a college girl in 2006 that was bizarre!  And far more frustrating to figure out than any of the typical dating games.  We'd have a great time on Friday or Saturday night, speak to each other during Sunday School, then he'd call on Wednesday or Thursday and ask me out for the weekend.  I found it so frustrating that I had to go days without hearing from him, without him calling or texting to see if we could "hang out."  He was being a pure gentleman and our modern world made me unappreciative.

After about six weeks of this pattern, he finally kissed me.  A snowy night, on my front stoop, he just leaned forward pulled me in and kissed me.  Before the date, my mother and boss both predicted this would be the night.  My mom (in all her cuteness) made me promise to call her when I got home.  Well, it was nearly midnight and I wasn't about to wake her up.  No, I just crawled in bed and slept with my bliss.  First thing the next morning she rang, all disappointed that he hadn't made his next move.  I had to laugh, she hadn't even met him, but I realized she was really rooting for our relationship.  A mother knows best.

Over the next two weeks we saw each other every day.  We met on campus to eat lunch or study, he came to my intramural Basketball games, or I went to his "Student's Together Ending Poverty" functions.  He and his friend Aaron came home with me over Easter holiday (Aaron tagging along may require a little explanation, but you're not going to get it this time around).

I remember walking through the Sutherland Church parking lot, hand in hand, just knowing he was thinking about marriage.  He joked with Aaron, "Yeah, my in-laws are pretty cool," and I knew the look he threw me was really a question, a check-in on my reaction. I responded with an affirmative, I was already imagining our life together.  Sure enough, on the drive home (with a little help from Aaron's surprise trivia) we talked about all the details.  Not wedding details, but the reality of what life together might look like.  It was a beautiful picture, one previously thought out in both our minds. That night, back in Logan we attended Ward Prayer, but before we went inside the Church he just had to find out if I'd been praying about him.  Of course I had.  I had been praying about him before he asked me out on that first date.  I was ready for life's next step, and I had no doubt he was the one to take it with.

So did I answer both questions -- scroll up -- Oh! The first picture.

Well, just as my mom was cheering for Ben before she even met him, his parents were doing the same.  So naturally, they wanted pictures.  I remember we were eating lunch together in the Taggart Student Center when he told me he needed to take a picture of me for his parents . . .  "Well, we're that serious?"  I thought.  In my mind I knew we were, but his need to photo me for the family confirmed my suspicions that he was digging me as deeply. This picture represents that lovely sense of satisfaction.        


Jodi said...

That is seriously the cutest picture of you guys! It just oozes of true love!

Jen said...

I still remember you coming home one night and saying "I'm stuck in the friend zone!" because he hadn't kissed you yet. Congratulations on 5 years!

Scott and Claudia said...

I loved the post sis. Congratulations on your upcoming five years! You are the perfect couple. We are so grateful that you found each other.
Love, Pa

Scott and Claudia said...

Oh that was such a sweet post Betty Lou! I loved it. And I love the two of you also and let's not leave out little one!! XOXOXOXO Mom

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